I recently received a couple of emails that essentially complained about the same thing. Specifically, that my posts to this blog have been serious and that I have so far failed to tap in to the more humorous of housing management issues. "You're a lot funnier when you talk," wrote one housing professional. (The speech therapist I had when I was 7 years old said the same thing, by the way).
So with this in mind I'll share a recertification story I haven't told lately in any seminars.
Early on in my career, I noticed that one of our senior residents -- a gentleman who was well into his 70's -- wore suits that would take at least six weeks of my pay to purchase. Now you must know that I have never been sartorially resplendent, even now, and would never qualify as a fashion plate even if that plate was made of paper. But I know expensive suits when I see them and this resident was always "dressed to the nines."
The thing was that his purported sole income source was SSI and he was getting around $450 per month. It just didn't add up. On the other hand, the HUD Handbook 4350.3, then as now, excludes clothing from being counted on the certification as it has a "personal property" exemption.
What to do?
When he came into the office for his next recertification, I complimented him on his nice suit. I then examined his SSI statement, looked at him, cocked my head somewhat sideways in a darned fine impression of my pet dog, Bruno, and raised my eyebrows. This was a totally calculated move on my part that I figured would result in one of two reactions: The resident would either "come clean" about how he got these nice suits, or he would burst into hysterical laughter. I was hoping for the former and I was not disappointed.
This resident was, by his own admission, a gigolo. According to him, he had a lady friend who insisted that he look wonderful whenever they went out. Several days later, he came in accompanied by this woman -- also in her 70's -- who gave me a signed and notarized statment attesting that she purchased all of the resident's expensive clothing, took him on trips to New York and Paris, etc. (I considered myself fortunate when my then girlfriend and I were able to get away to Cape Cod for a day or two).
This was yet another reminder to avoid assumptions at all costs, and an early indicator that I would never cease to be surprised in the field of housing management.

